I have days where I wonder if I went back and told me 20y old self on my wedding day what the next 4ys would bring and that it all works out. If I could go back to the day where they told us her diagnosis and tell myself that in 19 short months she'd be trying to make steps, feeding herself, and almost not using her Gtube I'm not sure is believe me. For good reason. I'm simply amazed everyday by gods grace in my life. I'm amazed that she gets herself her sippy and feeds herself. I'm amazed at when I say "do you want ..? " she says "uh huh!" I'm amazed at her laugh. Im amazed at how God has brought her and forever thankful! In a way if I could tell my 20y old self anything it's simple:
Your gonna be fine. God has prepared you and made you for this. He designed you in mind for your children. He designed Jay to stand behind you and his children. God will always provide. We've never had a need not met. God will bless you with a church that will rally. They'll rally their hearts out. They'll love till you think they'll burst and they'll accept like you wouldn't believe. He'll place a Sunday School director in your path that knows just what she needs. He'll shake up Jays work and him where he wants him. You'll fight with insurance companies but it always works out. Her therapist will love and push her. She'll love to read. She'll look nothing like you but she'll love to read like you.Oh and honey she'll eat. That is a PROMISE! Even better she'll make happy plates! She guzzle down sippies full of water. And she'll love. You'll love. Your family will change. I'll rock your world. Your family will accept,help, and fall in love. Elizabeth will mend family tiffs. She will bring your world into perspective. You will see Jay like you've never understood. You will fall in love with the man who throws your child over his shoulders and chases the dog all the while leaving havoc in their wake! To sum it up : Gods got this! Sit back and see! Your cup will surly runneth over!
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